Below is photographic evidence that suspect, Tami, actually participates in CrossFit.
Steve’s garage — scene of the carnage.
Steve — the accomplice.
Tami — the perpetrator. (Suspect attempting to escape, but she’s not bright enough to realize that the rower doesn’t actually go anywhere.)
The charge: rounding the back on a deadlift! Guilty. (No wonder my back is sore today.)
Thanks for the pictures Steve!